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An open and honest attitude towards sexuality is becoming the norm, but not all people seek liberation. 

For instance, for demisexuals, sex is possible only after experiencing a strong emotional connection and deep trust in a relationship.

Some researchers attribute demisexuality to orientation, others to the organization of sexual life. We believe that demisexuality, like most aspects of the manifestation of our sexuality, is always a union of innate and social, both in men and women.


Demisexuality can’t be diagnosed in the doctor’s office, this term exists rather for self-determination. Scientists do not distinguish its clear signs and symptoms. But demisexuals themselves periodically make up checklists. We’ve prepared one for you. You are demisexual if …

You do not associate people’s sexuality with their appearance

A person’s personality excites you more than appearance. In your eyes,  it’s a beautiful personality that makes a person attractive. You will not be tempted to a person with an angelic appearance if he/she has the brain of a pigeon or a piece of ice instead of a heart. If a person does not know how to maintain a thoughtful conversation and show emotions, he/she is not charming for you.

Sex is not so important for you

Demisexuality has nothing to do with frigidity. However, we must admit that sex attracts demisexual people less than intellectual conversations and watching Netflix together. The thought of sex doesn’t excite you so much as other people. For you, sex is a purely physical manifestation of pre-existing feelings that are greater and nobler than sex. The physical connection is interesting to you only in the continuation of the emotional – not vice versa.

Demisexuals can enjoy physical intimacy only if they’ve got a spiritual one. Moreover, prolonged abstinence from sex does not seem frightening to them. Ideal partners!

At the end of the day, it is more important for you to sleep with a person than to have sex with him/her. You like to create physical warmth through hugs and intimacy, and “sleeping with someone” does not necessarily mean sex. You like to sleep hugging.

The idea of casual sex is disgusting to you

You do not understand how someone can experience the pleasure of physical interaction which doesn’t presuppose any emotions, but only a short-term physical intimacy, designed to satisfy instinct. This is disgusting to you.

Your relationships start with friendship… always

It is much easier to feel a spiritual connection with a person whom you have known for ages. That is why the friendly feelings of demisexuals develop into something more often than usual.

You do not really like flirting

You do not start a relationship with flirting. You are not looking for potential partners in bars and clubs. As we said, all your relationships naturally develop from friendship.

You fall in love like a teen

Your love is always like the first time. If you are attracted to your partner, it is always a very deep and emotional connection. And a little platonic in the early days.

The first date is an important step for you

You are always very nervous before your first date. And sometimes overwhelm your crush with questions. It is very important for demisexuals to decide whether they feel a connection with their future soulmate.

Friends call you criticaster

You have perhaps the smallest sexual experience among friends, and acquaintances say: it’s time to be more easy-going. However, demisexuality and being picky are not the same thing. People of this ‘orientation’ are more careful in choosing a partner; understanding of their ideal comes to them with time.

If you like someone, it means a lot to you

You rarely get romantic feelings for someone because you are very demanding, so it always means a lot to you.  That’s why you never take feelings for granted because you know that they are based on a deep emotional drive.

You are not afraid of a serious relationship

If you already have a relationship, then you be deeply engrossed in it and devote yourself to it completely. For you, a real relationship is always serious, because you think that being with a chosen person is a privilege.

You love informative conversations

Smart conversations, communication in tune, accurate mutual understanding – all this brings you a real euphoria. This is better for you than anything else!

You do not like “adult films”

The porn completely devoid of emotions does not excite you at all. You do not understand how people can have sex without the slightest emotional attachment, so you are not interested in such films.

Have you figured it out now? 

If you think about it, demisexuals not only teach us not to get hung up on sex, but they show an alternative way of developing relations through their own example.

By the way, if you are interested in further discovering your sexuality, read What Do You Know About Non-Monogamy? We’re sure, you’ll find it exciting!


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